If you only knew...

Til I'm out of Texas. I'm worried, stressed, excited and paranoid but I'm so happy I'm taking the step towards a different life.

Can't wait to get out of here and be somewhere else,

X: Jess Blaqk[DF]

So as most know, I'm moving far away from home/Texas/this hellhole soon. The title explains a bit. It's 2 days until my 19th birthday and it seriously doesn't seem like it's been a year already It's unsettling, really. The year has gone by so fast and I don't feel like I've achieved anything yet. Boo.

I'm flying out in 32 days; hence the title. I'm preparing for the move mentally. I still need to get some things before I move but I don't have money right now so I don't know how this ...

I got paid today and I spent the majority on a flight out of Texas. I'm leaving January 15th and I don't plan on returning any time soon. (Maybe for family visits, but even that I'd like to limit.)

I'm excited. It's really happening. I'M GETTING THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

FUCK YESSSSSSS.

/short, happy spazz blog.

X: Jess Blaqk[DF]

I feel totally lame with this song reference but it makes a lot of sense to me right now. I'm learning to spread my wings and fly away from a situation that I'd long since outgrown.

I'm still working at Old Navy and I did take the 6 hour driver's ed course. (You'll know what I'm talking about if you read my last blog.) All I need now is to go do the actual driving part of the test and I'll have a license. I'm not too worried because everyone knows that I've been driving for 3 or 4 ...

That seems to be the encouraging words I need to hear lately yet at the same time, they hold me back.

They literally protect me with reminding me that letting my old life die is a good thing. They also hold me back by me thinking that I need to be protected from leaving the confides of this cage I call home. I know I have to get out...it's just a process.

So far, I'm helping myself out by getting a temporary job working at Old Navy. It's a 20 minute drive outside of ...