Contagion

This is a fairly recent one and I'm going to start with it first mainly because it's so fucking unbelievable.

Patient: “Could giving myself an enema with a garden hose every 3 days for 4 years be toxic or harmful?”

WHAT THE FUCK? Really?!

Now to be fair, this patient does have a traumatic brain injury, but whoever turns on the goddamn hose for him doesn’t. And he has to have someone turn on the hose…right? Unless he turns the hose on himself and then drags it through the house into the bathroom getting water everywhere (which would be amazing and I hope that’s what actually happens!).

Yes, I get to listen to shit like this all day. And, now, so do you.