You could call it a chronicle

You may criticize me about how trivial this may seem, but I only have one joint left and it's my last - for good. Though I'm not quitting smoking weed per se. I will refrain from purchasing, smoking at parties, and/or smoking on weekdays. I'm going to keep my papers, my grinder, my awesome pipe named Davey, and of course my bong named BongzillA.

I have discovered what it really does to me, and though it may be fun under certain circumstances, it's addicting when it's at my disposal, and it turns me into a complete idiot. So a 90% reduction is in order (at least until college starts); this way I can begin to think clearer and mature both personally and intellectually.

Along with this, I will drink slow at parties and never get drunk to the point of puking. I know my limit, I've been drinking for four years.

Oh, and for those of you who think it's offensive for me to name a drug pipe after DXH, the full name is Davey Jonze, because the pipe has a squid inside of it.