Tom Gabel is a girl

[Vikki.]

Because this is the first time a major rock star has come out as transgender

Life Of Agony?

Any any rate, good for her.

[Nasty Nate]

So...the wife becomes a lesbian?

Theresa, my thoughts exactly! i do not understand how this works. his wife is ok with and supports this decision? like... surprise, now you're married to someone else? does not compute

[Theresa]

....not to mention, the daughter who is only two, recognizes a mom and a dad..but will now have to try to figure out where dad went? I just don't understand this world anymore....

[Danzie]

Nothing wrong at all with being transgender, I fully support a person's right to express him or herself and be who they truly are, but shouldn't Tom have discussed how he truly views himself (before he was Laura) to his wife? I feel bad for his wife and daughter because this change will undoubtedly be difficult, but with situations similar to this one, I wish nothing but the best for the family. There was definitely some miscommunication in that family. I even feel worse for his wife since Tom noted that he was thinking of sex-reassignment surgery. This is a surefire way to rip apart a family...

[Danzie]

....not to mention, the daughter who is only two, recognizes a mom and a dad..but will now have to try to figure out where dad went? I just don't understand this world anymore....

Sorry for the double post, but I'm sure her parents will explain that daddy is now going to look like a mommy but will still be the same person. Children at that age are incredibly accepting and generally okay at tolerating new changes. I really doubt Tom's relationship with his daughter (and vice versa) will change, especially because she is only two. Should someone be forced to live a life they do not want to live to avoid an explanation to his/her spouse and child?

[Nasty Nate]

Sorry for the double post, but I'm sure her parents will explain that daddy is now going to look like a mommy but will still be the same person. Children at that age are incredibly accepting and generally okay at tolerating new changes. I really doubt Tom's relationship with his daughter (and vice versa) will change, especially because she is only two. Should someone be forced to live a life they do not want to live to avoid an explanation to his/her spouse and child?

i'm going to have to disagree with you. is "laura" still going to be referred to as "dad" by the child? i don't think you can say that it would be the same person but "look like mommy". at two years old the kid probably has no idea what's going on anyway, but at some point when the kid gets older they are going to have to explain why she has two moms. personally, i think being a kid is confusing enough as it is, but now these people will be deeply affecting this kid's thoughts and emotions for the rest of her life. i'm not saying what's right or wrong, but i can't imagine having to deal with the repercussions of a sex-change. literally, you would have to explain it to everyone and therefore could not be viewed as "the same person" because you have changed yourself nearly completely, which is the idea, right?

lastly, i just wanted to say that i think it is wholesomely unnatural to get a sex-change and no matter how many hormones you take you can never change the fact that you have X and Y chromosomes, therefore you are not really a woman no matter what you do.

[Danzie]

Hormones can help you "feel" more masculine or feminine. Replacing testosterone with estrogen probably induces a whole bunch of new feelings (I'm just guessing-- science ties testosterone to aggression so I'm assuming there are similar changes when you add estrogen and decrease testosterone). What's the problem if someone wants to present him or herself as the opposite sex if that's how the person feels? I'm sure Tom has thought of the repercussions of a sex-change and decided that this is the best option for him. I definitely feel conflicted on his/ her (whatever) circumstances since Tom waited so long to decide to do this after marrying a woman and having a daughter. If the wife and daughter weren't in the picture, then things would be much more straight forward.

[Theresa]

i'm going to have to disagree with you. is "laura" still going to be referred to as "dad" by the child? i don't think you can say that it would be the same person but "look like mommy". at two years old the kid probably has no idea what's going on anyway, but at some point when the kid gets older they are going to have to explain why she has two moms. personally, i think being a kid is confusing enough as it is, but now these people will be deeply affecting this kid's thoughts and emotions for the rest of her life. i'm not saying what's right or wrong, but i can't imagine having to deal with the repercussions of a sex-change. literally, you would have to explain it to everyone and therefore could not be viewed as "the same person" because you have changed yourself nearly completely, which is the idea, right?

lastly, i just wanted to say that i think it is wholesomely unnatural to get a sex-change and no matter how many hormones you take you can never change the fact that you have X and Y chromosomes, therefore you are not really a woman no matter what you do.

I agree.

I read that he was "considering gender reassignment surgery". I'm confused..why would he only be "considering" the surgery?..if he plans on being a woman, that means you cannot have the penis anymore. Am I missing something? I'm not trying to be rude or sarcastic, but isn't that what you do if you want to be one sex or the other?

[sbr]

Oddly enough, I've always that that jumping at every opportunity to be an idiot on the internet and/or engaging in some extremely banal concern trolling was unnatural, but, hey, that has never stopped some people.


Good for Laura. I'm happy that she's able to do what she needs to do to be the woman that she is. Not the woman she "feels" like. Not the woman she "thinks" she is. I admire her for doing so in such an open and public manner. I hope that any trials and tribulations she faces will ultimately serve to help others who are in a similar place understand that they aren't alone. Above all else, I hope that this ultimately proves to be another positive step toward making the world a slightly better, safer place for trans people, especially trans women and more specifically, trans women of color who are so frequently targeted for every possible form of abuse. If the publicity can help shine a light on these discussions and these situations, then that is a good thing. That's kind of a silly hope though, because, well, people. Would-be interwebs super expert scientists and soulless husks (not mutually exclusive categories) are the last people I'd expect to see approaching any level of understanding or demonstrating any degree of actual compassion, as they continue to prove that they are incapable of both.

[Mary.]

"If I could have chosen, I would have been born a woman.
My mother once told me
she would have named me Laura."

The Ocean has a whole new meaning after her announcement. I still find it amazing that she chose to come out publicly. Mad respect.